Girl Bye! Handling and Cutting off subtly toxic people

If I cut you off, chances are, you handed me the scissors.

Greeting Monday with a bold statement is such a badass, don’t you think? Hello girls I’m back! This subject has been in my drafts for some time now and since it’s my comeback(ish) article, I decided to give it a go. By nature, I’m a fixer I would probably think or bang my head a thousand times, before deciding which unfortunately sometimes lead me to a more miserable situation. My fashion advice: Less is more, which we could all probably use in terms of keeping (or not!) relationships with people. If it does not directly hurt you and the person is “not bad enough”, does it justify cutting ties? Answer, YES, it’s called self-care ladies (or DETOX?) In order to stay positive, we don’t want drama. So if you are in a situation where in you have doubts whether to pull the plug on someone or just eliminate them, here are my take on how to handle this type of situation, its easier when done the right way.

IG: wlyder11 

a. Talk - I know for some of you it’s dreadful, not all of us are confrontational. But you have to be an adult and say why you suddenly want that space or distance. Do you have that situation where on you need to rehash it with a friend to be able to feel ok again? This is the same case ladies, being able to talk or discuss it to that toxic person, weather she may like it or not is the proper thing to do. It is the other person’s problem if she does not believe or like your reasons, this way you can move forward in peace.  

b. Don’t Argue - no one likes to be cut out so there is a high possibility of anger, if the discussion gets heaty, remember you are not there to explain but to restate your boundaries. Don’t feed into it or allow it. Respecting boundaries comes naturally to well-adjusted adults, unlike toxic people which thrive on violating them. Just state your reason, you don’t need to answer why, how or give additional details.

c. Create distance - there are people who are not really toxic but would just be a “drag”.  I have a friend who would constantly declines offers in order to avoid any interactions with a specific person, and would ask me if doing so is bad. Well, I just have to give her this blog link later, I’m sure she’ll benefit from this in the future. Totally fine if you would rather spent time with other friends who are positive and contributes to you’re feeling good.

d. Not do anything at all - probably easiest among all, just remember, you don’t owe anyone an explanation. Slowly ghost out of their lives until you are no longer affected by their negativity.

IG: wlyder11

Ladies life is too short to be anything but happy, surround yourself with people who make you laugh and focus solely on the good. 

xoxo,

Clyde

Working out and loving it!

Roll back the time, if someone says, lets exercise, go jogging or go to the gym, I would probably roll my eyes at them and make all the excuses I can think about just to escape a sweat session. I maintained my weight by refusing to eat rice, meat and all stuff oily. I won’t avoid sweets but I will cut down meal portions, (note: kitty portion) and sometimes skip it, yes not a good habit, I was being bad to my body.  I am very grateful that a year ago, someone encouraged me to go jogging, work out with me, eat right, and occasionally be OK to eat whatever I want.  Fast track to today, I never felt more active, stronger and good, and I can say I exercise and yes I love it!  Old self would cringe at the word jog, new self will say let’s go! Today let me share how I formed the habits and fall in love with exercise.

Find the right one

Ask yourself what you enjoy doing that involves having to move (a lot or not). If you love dancing, then maybe you’ll enjoy Zumba class, if you into cycling then a spinning class would be a choice, get the picture here? I get bored easily if I stay in one place so outdoor jogging works for me, I get to enjoy the scenery and come across other joggers during my 30-60 mins run.

IG Photo: wlyder11

IG Photo: psbysophia

Ignore the scale

Before, if my digits do not decrease after a week of exercising, I won’t have the heart to exercise. Nowadays, I don’t use the weighing scale that much anymore, I just work out. Complaining of not dropping the 1 or 2 lbs won’t help, it makes working out a “must do”. Instead , focus on the benefits that exercise gives you, like energy boost, better sleep and relieves stress.

Clothes

Do you think I won’t include this? It’s also a part of forming the habit, if you’re dressed for it then 100% you’ll be motivated to act like it. It might be psychological, but it has helped me, really!

Find a Buddy

Make it social, find a friend/buddy who has the same fitness goals, its motivating to have people who can relate to your work out progress. Plus you’ll have somebody to constantly remind you, or vice versa about the routine that you must follow.

Change, don’t over do

If you over do some exercises then it’s not enjoyable anymore, it becomes more of a chore. Find an alternative in between your routine jog. My exercise buddy would occasionally sign us both for spinning; prepare an intense 30min mix of moves with running work-outs or outdoor cycling. This way, I don’t get bored and my body gets that shock so that I’ll get that continued benefits.

Reward yourself

This method never gets old with me, and I believe applies to you too. Besides feeling good after achieving even the smallest fitness goals, treat yourself! A big pat on the back and reward yourself with that food that you’ve been craving for, just be mindful of the portion. Aside from food, a facial, manicure or massage is an ideal treat.

Have a playlist for your work-out session helps too, crank up that volume! I believe there are so much more habits that a health buff can add to my list, but for now if you’re planning to start, do it gradually, and most importantly, listen to your body, know when to stop, hydrate and eat. 

 xoxo,

Clyde

One for the Hommes: Jensen’s Lookbook

Hi guys, before the month ends I’m letting a good friend of mine take over my blog. I looked over the entries I’ve had here for the past years and noticed that I have never done a single one for the hommes.  So today let me introduce to you Jensen, who also shares the same interest for fashion and travel. I admire him for not letting his crazy busy work schedule gets in the way of planning a trip every now and then. Working, travelling, taking photos, blogging and looking good sounds a bit too much, so on his birth month, I would like to take a page and share with you Jensen’s style, take a look on how he normally would dress to impress on a daily work day basis. Below are the top 3 looks which are my favorites.

 Look 1:  White pants and floral printed button-up

Love love love white pants!, if I’m not that clumsy I would love to wear white pants always, but such a klutz and nowadays I’m always running around here and there to run errands. Love this outfit on Jensen, it looks neat, comfy and very summery because of the print.

Look 2: Neutral accessories

Pair with a white bottom, this printed long sleeves is very hard to pull-off if you think about the weather in the Philippines. But an 8hour job inside a centralized building makes it easy. The bag, belt and the shoes top with the hat looks fab.

Look 3: Bold Blue

It’s very obvious that I’m biased with a white piece of outfit, but when Jensen paired it with this blue top, it pops! I love when an outfit has this one pop of color, adds fun and energy to the whole look.

You can check out Jensen’s travel photo here. 

For all you Hommes out there, visit BONOBOS for a Better fitting, Better looking men’s clothing and accessories. They offer a one-on-one service that will guide you to find your perfect fit.

 xoxo,

Clyde

Sexy Options - Lingerie gifting

I blinked and January was over.  Valentine's day is next week and I absolutely cannot let it pass without dropping hints on what to get your love ones (or me?) on Vday. Roses and chocolates are the safest bet, but admit at some point you have given or thought about giving a sexy pair of Lingerie.  For those who have already gifted Lingerie - thumbs up! But for some who still have second thoughts about getting that sexy pair, here are some of my insights that might finally convince you.

Giving Lingerie does not always mean it’s a suggestive gift, we appreciate it and here’s why:

1. I love to match my outfit and having said this, I would most of the time match my underwear too, they might not be a pair but they must be at least the same shade.

2. For me any occasions is a good reason to get a pair of lingerie.  People might not see it, but if you have a good pair 
on, it feels good also.

3. Because you will never know, any night could be the night! Kidding, but just in case, I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be caught wearing your granny panties, right?

4. We love our PJs, but it’s always nice to slip on something a little more sexy that our regular pajamas.

5. For couples - it’s a gift for both of you - you bought something that you’ll enjoy seeing her in, get that perspective?

But before heading out to get one, please make sure to buy something you already know she prefers. Get the style she likes that makes her comfortable.  A comfortable woman is a confident woman and a confident woman is a sexy woman.  Check out ADOREME, they have a wide selection you can choose from, and here are a few that are most popular and personal favorites:

Adoreme - Noreh

Adoreme - Laralyn

Adoreme - Elvinia

Adoreme - Felice

xoxo,

Clyde

Get that Love flowing,  check out Adoreme's additional Valentine's Tips:

Diving in to the one piece swimsuit trend

It's not summer I know but who can resist to go on a vacation for a quick city getaway. Destination - a spa resort, and we want to be dressed location appropriate so this means wearing a swimwear.  I'll admit, I'm a bit (more) anxious now to wear bathing suit, after moving to a new country, a part of adjusting and coping means stress eating, thus the weight gain. But this trip has given me a good reason to find the right bathing suit that is comfortable to wear and make me look great too. That being said, so thankful for the revival of the one piece bathing suits. A few years back perceived as the "mom/ old lady swimwear" is now the hottest style on beachwear. Get to know what I pick, and my other one piece swimwear suggestions and where to get them below.  

Black Crochet Open Back Monokini Swimsuit from Maykool @ $24.99 , it also comes in white.

Also from Maykool, green strapless one piece
for $21.99

Blue lace up one piece also for $21.99

Strapless, printed, color blocked or graphic styled – one piece swimwear doesn’t longer mean you’re a serious swimmer or body conscious, there are many styles out there which you can choose that will remind you that maybe 2 piece ones aren't always the best pick.

xoxo,

Clyde

Short girl problems - how to instantly look taller in photos

Short girl over here, vertically challenged.... in my native tongue 'pandak', that’s me! Hey, I've got no problem but there are times I really (really) wish that I had long legs. Apart from making the clothes look more flattering, I think people who are taller have the advantage of looking more chic in photos. Gladly nowadays Photoshop no more because there are so many apps that would make you look taller, slimmer, fairer and even have make up on. My phone has a couple of apps that I use to enhance my instagram photos, but more often I would prefer  to share the unedited and raw pictures of me because by doing this, I think you could relate more to me. So how to avoid adding the 10 pounds in your photo, read below.

1. Monochrome dressing - umm am I right that most of your clothes are black, because we've been told that black makes us look skinnier but did you know wearing all black will actually make you look smaller?  So you need to start to  have fun and add some color to your wardrobe, just bear in mind to  wear the same shade  (bottom and top) to make you look leaner and taller. Bottom options should be darker than your top.

2. Long sleeves - yes if you want to create that illusion go for the long sleeve instead of the short ones.

3. Low V-neck - blouses, tops or dresses can fool the camera into thinking you have long torso.

Now you know what to wear, here's how to shoot.

1. Photos that are taken straight on tends to focus on the models stomach, making you look smaller, but if the angle is a low shooting position and an upward angle it will make you look taller and thinner.

Romper: Cotton On, Wedge: Charles & Keith

2. If you shoot slightly above the head, it also creates a difference. You looking up towards the camera can make your neck and torso look longer.

3. Cross your legs at your ankles - now you know why I do this ALL THE TIME in my photo, this pose automatically make my thighs and calves appear slimmer.

Pumps: Steve Madden

4. Lastly walk, make longer steps and click! This pose makes your legs look longer too!

I hope what I shared today helps and contributes to your feed goals!

xoxo,

Clyde

Creating your Calm, Cost free ways to Relax

 

Weekend just got better, woke up to the smell of a freshly brewed coffee. Weekend mornings are the best because nothing beats taking your time getting up, enjoying your breakfast, slowly sipping your coffee and just enjoying your window view. We work ourselves so hard during the work week, stressing, worrying and always rushing, it’s nice to just slow down during the short break. I know our Instagram post always includes eating out, binging, partying, and yes sometimes shopping – but believe me it’s not always the case. Relaxing doesn’t always mean we need to spend, there are frugal, simple ways to just take a break, enjoy the moment and create your calm.  So as the month gets closer to end and so as our monthly budget, we present our cost free list to relax :

1. Have coffee or tea – don’t rush, enjoy the smell and take your time. 

My morning view

 2. Read a book – well reading isn’t for everybody, hmm... a fashion magazines will do!

3. Listen to music – sing along to it, we are guilty of listening to old songs on Sundays and we sing along to it aloud! (err …OPM)

4. Write a journal – it can be a letter to self or just something that you are thinking at the moment, who knows it can be a future entry to your own blog!

5. Call a friend – it’s because of social media that we just don’t pick up the phone that often, reconnecting with a good old friend can be a good feeling.

6.  Light a candle – there is something about the flicker of light that is so calming and romantic.

Scented Candles by Bath and Body Works

 7. Go for a walk – we’re lucky we have parks near our place, it doubles up as a workout if done longer, but if it’s a concrete jungle where you are, take a cue from my good friend Sen – its clears the mind!

IG : jeens005 "Thoughts come clearly when one walks"

 

  8. Go jogging – it’s torture if you’re doing it for the first time, but after a few times, it does feel good, bonus is, you get fitter every day! No need to feel so guilty about eating the whole slice of cheesecake.

 9. Cook and eat your meal in silence – we ladies enjoy cooking right, try enjoying your masterpiece alone.

 10. Take a bath – we always rush in the morning, so during weekends a good scrubbing, soaking and facial is a must for me, its pamper time in the shower!

Lastly when you go out today, give someone a SMILE, it’s very powerful you could be making someone’s gloomy day to be better. Can you add more to my list? Have an energizing break ladies!

xoxo, 
Clyde